LOVELY
About the eBook
“We would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism."
Todd Ruthman
Ever notice how certain occasions are rife with uber-sweet nothings? Weddings. Interviews. Making up. Finishing in second place — or further back in the pack. Opportunities for thoughtfulness are plentiful. Pivotal moments demand the most sensitive, well-meaning critics on the job. Often, they’re nowhere to be found.
Honest feedback, especially when coupled with free means to greater ends, shouldn’t be painful. It’s a gift. You’re delivering something of tremendous value. While it’s precious, it’s also something that few wish to pursue or receive.
"Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfills the same function as pain in the human body. It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things."
Winston Churchill
Lovely dissects what’s said and not done in place of taking honest and helpful action. The author discusses giving and receiving advice and feedback. He explores both mechanisms and obstacles like critical thinking, conflict resolution, learned helplessness and more.
LOVELY is available in audio book for $10.
Sections include:
I. FOIBLES ABOUND
II. FALSE POSITIVES
A. CHOOSE STRENGTH
B. DECONSTRUCTING SWEETENERS
C. UP SOMETHING
D. A PINCH OF SUGAR
E. “JUST SAYING”
F. THE EVERWISE MODEL
III. STRENGTH TRAINING
A. INDIFFERENCE BREAKING
B. AMPLIFICATION
C. A REGIMEN
IV. INNER WORKINGS
A. PRACTICES AND OBSTACLES
B. PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT
C. CRITICAL THINKING
D. INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION
E. LEARNED HELPLESSNESS
F. CONFLICT RESOLUTION
SUMMARY
Praise from Readers
"I have to admit. I’ve had thin skin for far too long. This book is helping with that. I love the concept of free advice. That really is the truth with critiques."
Laura Q.
"I remember thinking that art majors were silly in college. I have a different perspective now. They were learning from tough love on a daily basis. Tough love is missing from most classrooms, and that’s a shame."
Donovan T.
"This book takes what most people simplify to criticism and illustrates the vast psychology behind this very interesting subject. The author writes like he is sitting across from you at a coffee shop."
Priya V.
"I can’t believe how much wisdom was packed into such a short, easy read. I liked seeing the real world example of how this is being used by Everwise."
Gillian P.
"The humor in this book made it for me. The knowledge is great, but hearing from Woody Allen and even that scene from the TV show Newsroom were great examples. Highly recommend this!"
Chen L.
"The material in this book can be tough to swallow. Once you get past any previous hangups (for example, calling it criticism vs. critiques), there is so much to take away here. This book is dense but also quick reading."
Michael D.
”The cover makes it look like a fluff piece. This book is far from that. I found it very enlightening. I’m embarrassed that I was so easily annoyed by opinions in the past. Some will remain annoying, but others can now be put to good use!"
Rochelle L.
Perfect for:
Learning to receive critiques and criticism, becoming better at providing feedback, recognizing unproductive work and relationship behaviors, identifying barriers to success, increasing engagement, developing humility and more.
Sample
The most common uses of ‘critical’ put people on edge — enduring someone who’s overly critical, or visiting the bedside of someone in critical condition. Both are unhappy times.
However, critical also embodies powerfully positive traits — judicious, decisive, vital and indispensable. This spirit is the inspiration for Lovely.
Honest feedback, especially when coupled with free means to greater ends, shouldn’t be painful. It’s a gift. You’re delivering something of tremendous value. While it’s precious, it’s also something that few wish to pursue or receive.
Before going too far, let me assure you that I prefer lightly-sweetened critiques. A little bit of sugar makes any bitterness more palatable. I’m asking that you avoid using multiple packets.
Critiques that amplify strengths achieve more than those designed to address weaknesses. That doesn’t mean that you abandon one for the other. A balance should be struck.
Bearers of perspective and suggestions deliver the highest order of assistance to those in need. The process shouldn’t be delayed, nor should it be completely watered-down. Keeping quiet, gushing, passing the buck or otherwise withholding substance are letdowns to anyone who’s at least somewhat dear to you.
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Best of all? Lovely is FREE!
You'll receive a PDF booklet.
This publication features traditional
book formatting and a full-color cover.
LOVELY is available in audio book for $10.
